A Heartfelt Thanks to My Mentors: Reflections on Aging with Dignity and Compassion

Gratitude has a profound way of shaping our lives. It’s in this spirit that I want to take a moment to express my deepest thanks to the mentors who have guided me along my journey. A special acknowledgment goes to Michelle Shaul, whose unwavering love, support, and belief in me—even when I couldn’t believe in myself—have been a constant source of strength. Michelle, your kindness and encouragement have illuminated my path in ways that words cannot fully capture.

I’d also like to share a memory that has stayed with me for many years—one that speaks to the depth of wisdom that comes from those who’ve lived long lives and faced the realities of aging with grace. When I was working at Coffey & Thompson, I would often notice Mr. Paul Thompson, the owner, heading out to a funeral almost every weekend. One day, out of curiosity, I asked, “Mr. Thompson, are you going to another funeral?” He gave me a gentle smile and replied, “Edwin, life has seasons, and the season I’m in now is the season of saying goodbye to my friends. One day, you and others will come to say goodbye to me.”

At the time, his words didn’t fully sink in. But as the years passed, I found myself standing in a room, just as he had predicted, saying my own farewell to him. It was then that I realized how much wisdom he had imparted to me, not only through his words but through his actions and the way he approached life’s transitions. One of the most enduring lessons I learned from Mr. Thompson was the importance of respecting and showing gratitude toward the older generations.

He often reflected on the reality of aging, lamenting how society seems to cast aside those who are no longer in their prime. “We older folks have worked hard to make changes and improve our communities,” he would say. “I don’t understand why growing old has become the worst thing—nobody wants to be around us anymore, and we’re no longer seen as competitive in the job market.” Perhaps this is why so many of his older friends ended up working for him—his respect for them was palpable, and his philosophy on life was rooted in compassion and understanding.

The more I reflect on Mr. Thompson’s words, the more I realize how relevant they are to my own journey. Aging is an inevitable confrontation with ourselves—physically, mentally, and spiritually. As we grow older, we face changes that challenge our perceptions of who we are and what we are capable of. Now, at 53, I’ve begun to feel the physical shifts myself. The aches and pains, or “los achaques,” as we say in Spanish, are subtle reminders that time waits for no one. I’m learning to accept that the vitality I once had isn’t always there, and that’s okay.

For a gay man, aging can bring its own set of complexities. Many of us don’t have children, and some don’t have the traditional family structures that others rely on for support in old age. The idea of facing the later years of life alone can be intimidating, especially as our health and strength become more uncertain. The body, with all its imperfections, begins to show the toll of time—whether from our habits, our choices, or simply our genetic inheritance. But in this recognition, there’s also a sense of liberation, an understanding that the human body is, in many ways, like a vehicle. It carries us through life’s journeys, and as with any vehicle, wear and tear are inevitable. These changes, however, are not just signs of aging—they are reflections of the lives we’ve lived and the lessons we’ve learned.

Aging with dignity, then, is more than just a personal challenge. It’s a call to action—a reminder that we must also respect and honor those who are on this journey with us. Paul Thompson’s philosophy of compassion toward older generations has deeply influenced the way I view this process. It has opened my eyes to the importance of treating aging not as a burden, but as a phase of life that deserves respect, care, and understanding.

As I look ahead, I feel a renewed sense of purpose. Aging is not something to fear, but something to embrace with curiosity and grace. With God’s guidance, I hope to continue learning how to help others navigate this process with the dignity they deserve. Mr. Thompson’s lessons on aging, compassion, and the value of each stage of life have left a lasting mark on me. His wisdom lives on, not only in my memories but in the way I choose to live and the way I hope to help others do the same.

Thank you, Mr. Thompson, for showing me that every season of life holds its own beauty, and for teaching me the importance of compassion and respect as we all move through this journey together.

With all my heart, thank you.

—Edwin Gil